I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Why did my mother make you get naked?
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