the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Randomize
