yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
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