why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I cut my penus on the lid.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
