well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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