you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
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