Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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