i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
