it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
