Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize