and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize