He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
