There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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