Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
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