Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
