So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
