just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Randomize