There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
