areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
