I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
