A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
