So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
