i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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