On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Randomize
