I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
