Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
