I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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