I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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