Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Randomize
