i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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