Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
