My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
