Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
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