I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize