I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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