Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
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