No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
