Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
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