The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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