U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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