Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
