went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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