Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
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I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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