my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
MIDGETS
????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize