it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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