and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Randomize
