so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Randomize