Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
