ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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