just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
3 2 1 whiskey
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
