Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
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